~*::{Mary, our Protectress and Angel of New Beginnings}::*~This week I am combining two of my usual posts into one. You see, this is a week for closure. A time to pay our respects to a beloved person that has passed on to another place filled with light and love. It is also a time where signs and symbols of our old lives have ceased to exist for us...a time where you realize that all that you were in the past no longer has a hold on your future.
I have held on the struggle of other's expectations for myself for all of my life. I have burdened my soul with notions that I must shield and protect myslef by burrowing in and creating barriers to keep me safe and warm. This past week, I believe that I have started to have closure on the death of a person that others have wanted me to be, and not the one that I have become.
Have you ever had someone look right through you, as if you didn't exist? The feeling is quite unnerving, especially if the person was once thought to be the "love of your life". ( I have since come to know the truest of love from another, my awesome husband, Keith. I am also grateful for seeing his true worth and the depth of his soul...but that is another whole post) Funny though, I belive that this was all quite timed and perfect, because for the first time, it did not matter that I was invisible. I had achieved closure. For this, I am greatful. For he was the part of my past that was riddled with destruction and foolishness. With acting out all the pain and fear that I held so deeply inside..for way too long.
So, for this week I applaud closure and all of the wonderful things that it affords us. I say hooray to the ending of relationships and phases in our lives, for with the end of one thing, there is an opportunity to begin something brand new. This year is all about that for me... I am grateful and Inspired.
3 comments:
I truly felt a letting go from you in that post. It was like a balloon popping, or a bubble bursting or water rushing over a waterfall...you sound free from something. I am very happy for you! What a fulfilling feeling!
I applaud your courage; closures are challenging. I used to hang on too long (to everything), but finally learned that hanging on simply blocks the new. Now I look forward to each phase of life with great joy.
Hi dear Kasia, I'm so sorry you had to let your mother-inlaw go. And yes just like my dear aunt she's with God now. I also feel that they are in the best place to be. But time for mourn I just need. So my closure will come too.
Thanks for you sweet words my friend. Hope you'll be fine too.
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